Brain Barf

May contain traces of nuts.

Friday, June 08, 2007

Break the window, burn the soufflé, scream a lullaby

I'm so w e a r y.
I'm so tired of being a single parent.
I work all day and my husband works all night.
Every game/practice, boo boo, meeting, meltdown, homework, sibling argument etc. is my 100% responsibility to figure out.

Then the weekend comes and my husband and I head off in different directions.
Not very conducive to happy marital relations. Another entire issue that weighs heavy.
So much so that my husband has applied to a new job that would mean him leaving the company he has worked for, for twelve years...singularly because it would be a day shift.

I've leaned harder (I loathe asking for help LOATHE) on my sister than anyone ever before. She has really stepped up, and is awesome, and I love her and need to find a way to say those words better so she really hears and understands how much I really feel and appreciate her.
Take tonight for example, my oldest daughter had practice in a town 1/2 hour away, my boys had a home game and my younger daughter had a home game but on a different field.
This is pretty standard.
I haven't even figured out tomorrow, where I have to work in the evening and both of my girls have practices in the 1/2 an hour away town, and my boys have a home game.
Oy.

Joe in Vegas and another one of my sisters questioned why?
Why indeed?
Because I'm the one who pretty much BIRTHED them and brought them into this world.
Each of my children is only involved in one sport (OK fine, multiple teams yes).
Other than softball/baseball, my daughters are only involved in band.
Not much else, praise Buddha.
But, this is the only childhood they get.
No do overs.
I have no regrets, but I do feel stretched a little too thin sometimes.
So I stay up way too late and whine on my blog and post Carly Simon lyrics.

Baby sneezes
Mommy pleases
Daddy breezes in
So good on paper
So romantic
So bewildering
I know nothin' stays the same

But if you're willin' to play the game
It's comin' around again
So don't mind if I fall apart
There's more room in a broken heart
Pay the grocer

You fix the toaster
You kiss the host goodbye
Then you break a window
Burn the soufflé
Scream the lullaby

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2 Comments:

  • At Friday, June 08, 2007 7:24:00 AM, Blogger JoeinVegas said…

    I remember (almost) the only childhood I had. What I remember most are summers on my bike; riding down the big hill, playing ball out on the street in the late evening, warm weather.
    Sounds like you really care for the kids.

     
  • At Friday, July 20, 2007 7:38:00 AM, Blogger Sister Mary Lisa said…

    I completely understand this stuff, only my husband is one of the kids after I get home. It's very similar to single parenting. Except one of the children thinks he's the boss.

     

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