Brain Barf

May contain traces of nuts.

Saturday, September 25, 2004

Please join me in my daily constitutional.

Walk up my three steps. Trip over the toys on my sidewalk. Don't even fucking knock on my door because that is SO against the rules. Anyway, walk inside, get attacked by two dogs. Please be patient while Moses sniffs your crotch, and Petunia bites your ankles. Notice the pure, blissful chaos happening. Yum. One 12 year old completely controlled by raging hormones"oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my freaking gosh!". One ten year old, MOOOOOooooom, Petunia shit on my homework, and it HURTS when I itch it!! ( I dunno, maybe try not itching it?)
5 year old twins, one with a cape thinking that he can climb the entertainment center and fly from it onto the sofa, and the other one with a mitt thinking that he can catch him. Yes!! Life is good!
Man: In the kitchen lifts up shirt to see what reaction it elicits from woman.
Woman: Thinks to herself "Game on" and stops mopping the floor and lifts up her shirt.
Man: Wonders if this was a fluke, and tries it again this time with "shakage" and finger licking and wet nippleage rubbing.
Woman: Lifts shirt and commences the "shakage" with finger licking and wet nippelage rubbing.
Man: Is completely naked in 1.2 seconds.
Woman: Has to hold onto the wall, because all strength has left her legs and she must surrender to horse laughing, loss of vision and urine leakage.
Welcome to my world.
Come on over anytime, life is good here.


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